In Love And Hate
I don't think there is anyone who, at one point in his/her life, hasn't felt hatred towards a person. But what is hate? According to the dictionary:
noun: the emotion of hate; a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action
verb: dislike intensely; feel antipathy or aversion towards
But do I really hate a person? Or is it the way they act that causes the feelings of hate and resentment?
For a long time I saw the person and the act as being one and the same. After close examination and consideration I came to the understanding there is a very clear distinction. No, I don't hate the person. I even understand and sympathize, for we are all born with the same sin-nature, therefore I can love the person. It's their act, their attitude, their way, that I hate.
Doesn't that make it easier to love my enemies?! :-)
Psalm 119:128
Therefore all Your precepts concerning all things I consider to be right; I hate every false way.
noun: the emotion of hate; a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action
verb: dislike intensely; feel antipathy or aversion towards
But do I really hate a person? Or is it the way they act that causes the feelings of hate and resentment?
For a long time I saw the person and the act as being one and the same. After close examination and consideration I came to the understanding there is a very clear distinction. No, I don't hate the person. I even understand and sympathize, for we are all born with the same sin-nature, therefore I can love the person. It's their act, their attitude, their way, that I hate. Doesn't that make it easier to love my enemies?! :-)
Psalm 119:128
Therefore all Your precepts concerning all things I consider to be right; I hate every false way.
15 Comments:
I "hate" this definition of hate. There are feelings of hatred and hateful thoughts but when you hate something or someone you have aligned your thoughts and feelings and turned your will against that thing or person. Hate is not an emotion, it is a state of being and is a choice we make. We cannot choose our thoughts or our feelings but we can determine our attitude. Do you hate that I stated all this (I hope not because I love you)? ;-)
Kc:
I totally agree that hate is a state of being and a choice when it comes to our attitude towards what it is we resent. That is why I think it's so important to make a distinction between the person and their action, their way. Feelings and the accompanied thoughts occur and are real but that's where we need to stop and consider what it is we hate and my experience is that after consideration, it's the actions that I detest and not the person. Understanding that, I can then do what Christ commanded me to do, to love my enemies.
But I can still hate their way:-)
Stupid question! You know very well I love you (big grin). And I appreciate your thoughts:-)
God's Grace.
Goede morgen zuster!
HaHaHa!
You're my best Dutch teacher =)
Dank u.
Ik hou van jou eveneens!
HeHeHe!
Your post is indeed very thought-provoking.
Some people are so much more adorable that we can just love them so easily and naturally. We are simply attracted to them in a very positive and encouraging manner. They display a very godly character. Friends are just drawn to them.
On the other hand, we find it very challenging to accept some people. To love them requires alot of hurts and patience on our part. Eventually we might just leave them alone. But will God be happy? No. We need to learn to love the unlovables too.
Audrey:
Goede morgen!!!:-) You keep amazing me with your Dutch. Ok, girl, what are you hiding? A dutch language course? Another teacher? Maybe some Dutch heritage? hehe.
I think you just defined it:"They display a very godly character."
It's easy to love those people.
But it's about the ones that don't display this godly character.
We all are born with the same nature and we all have the same choice as well: live God's way or men's way (the way of the world). It's the way, the path, we choose to go, that defines our actions. Hence my conclusion to make a clear seperation between a person and their way:-)
Ik hou ook van jou, lieve (dear, sweet) zuster:-)
God's Grace.
Yes the insight that there is a distinction between the person himself/herself and their act, attitude, and way etc is imortant!Thanks for that Corry!
Kitty:
You are more then welcome, I hope it helped some. As if you needed the help! You are an example and such an encouragement to me:-)
God's Grace.
That's why I have my daughter, ya, the teen, and myself pray for whoever is ticking us off at the time. Because by praying for them we can separate the person from whatever that person has done to cause us pain or anger. People will always have the ability to hurt us, and will hurt us, because we love and live in a fallen world. Sometimes readjusting how I see "my enemy", from hurtful person to hurting person, helps my heart soften. I've been wronged, we all have, and I want to show my girls another way than harboring resentment. Trouble is, when I have to fake it, they always can tell. Sometimes I wish I didn't have such intelligent, gifted children!
Great post!
Karyn:
Those intelligent gifted children act on what they have been shown and raised with. They were (and still are) led by a great example: you!:-)
"from hurtful person to hurting person"
Very well said! Thanks.
Have a blessed weekend, Karyn:-)
God's Grace.
Corry, I don't know about you but I do have bonafide (sp?) hate that comes from inside of me. I wouldn't flower it over that it is only the actions that I hate, because that is making a white washed tomb. I hate because I am hateful. The hate comes from the sin black hole that is in my flesh. The sin then is nailed to the cross and Jesus Christ replaces it with His own love and grace - that beautiful reality that is divine and makes no sense. For me, I don't want to conquer up weird twists. Say and think it like it is.
I have mixed feelings about this. I can apply it to people I deal with in every day life. But I have a hard time with people in authority who do things to hurt others. Be it politicians that don't take care of the poor-do more damage to our environment by their regulations and laws, CEO's that steal from the companies and hurt their employees-lost jobs, lost pensions. As I write this, I realize that my hate is judgmental and God will judge them in the end. Maybe you are right- I need to pray for them. Not only my enemies-but enemies of the poor and the environment, the disabled, the marginalized people of the world.
Andrea:
Thank you so much for sharing your opinion and thoughts on this. They are highly appreciated!:-)
I know this is a very deep subject that we all struggle with. May God bless us with wisdom and understanding to do all things in accordance with His will and to His glory.
Patti:
You are right, both need our prayers and I will join you in doing so:-)
God's Grace.
Yes, Patti is right.
If we don't reach out to the marginalized people of the world, who will? They'll remain the silent and abused lot among us. It's so sad to see them being neglected and taken advantage of.
The gap between the haves and have-nots is growing glaringly.
Thus, I respect Mr Bill Gates and his wife for helping the children who are living in the third world.
Audrey:
You are such a loving person:-)
love ya!
God's Grace.
that's one of the hardest thing God has told me to do. forgiving the people i hate most. that's not even loving yet. but i thank God that He's helping me out on this. i have forgiven but i'm asking God to heal my hurts.
Jayne:
For too long I have generalized it as well and associated it with the person and not the action.
But you are so right,with the grace of God, any feeling of hatred can quickly turn to love!
Pia:
I know what you mean. You got to go through the hurt to get to the healing. But to forgive is an act of love as well:-)
Hang in there girl! God bless you.
God's Grace.
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